These are a few of my own works, one text and one a painting as well as a plan for a project I am currently working on which will connect the work of many perspectives to create one whole perspective, a key idea within my portfolio and here I hope to bring it to life. Within these I have explored my emotions as well as the emotions of my family as they go through big life changes which is another thing I have had great focus on this past semester, so I felt it must be included.
A lonely weight rests upon me. Unable to let go, unable to release. As though I am pulled in every direction. A pressure that expands within me. A desire to cry, to scream, to find an escape. But instead I smile, I laugh and I go on.
This is a poem I wrote in my red notebook during Professor Tamura’s unit for myself. That unit made me realize that although I cannot talk about my feelings, I can write them and doing so helped me through the semester. It is about the way my thoughts make my body feel, the way they become physical pain and how trapped I feel within them. Throughout my life I have kept my feelings in to help those around me and as a result I had a lot of unanswered questions and many feelings I didn’t know how to handle. These feelings built into something I could only describe as pressure within me, something I had to let go but didn’t know how so it continued building. My emotions, part of my body’s archive, became physically uncomfortable and this piece describes that.
Big Empty House
This is a picture depicting how my dad feels going through his divorce. My dad bought a house with enough rooms for my siblings to all come stay with him, but my siblings choose to stay with my mom in the smaller house more often because of things that happened. He finds it very difficult to be alone like that, so he tries to make it homey, he even put up a Christmas tree which only makes it more sad for me. There is nothing he can do because my siblings will only blame him more if he forces them to stay with him. I feel like this connects to the theme of the body because the body and mind are connected, and throughout his life he has lost control of his body and mind which led to the loneliness his body feels now. He now feels helpless to his state of being alone and is resigned to that feeling because he does not know how to change it.
Plan for Future Project: A Full Perspective
I want to get many people to write about or create art to represent something that from their perspective is the most difficult thing they encounter because of something they cannot control, it can be sexuality, gender, height, a disability (mental or physical), anything they feel is the most difficult for them. From there I will tie all of these pieces together into one collection of perspectives to form “A Full Perspective.”